I just read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. I don’t want to cause any trouble – but shouldn’t that be an even number?
Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
I find it ironic that the colours red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
America is a country that produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won’t cross the street to vote.
You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s your common sense leaving your body.
Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.
I think my neighbour is stalking me, as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.