The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.
Money will buy a fine dog but only kindness will make him wag his tail
If you don’t have a sense of humour you probably don’t have any sense at all.
Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you’re in deep water.
How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?
Business conferences are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.
Why is it that at school reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?
Stroke a cat and you will have a permanent job.
No one has more driving ambition than the teenage boy who wants to buy a car.
There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.
There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number at 4 am; for example, it could be the right number.